Art of Apology Pt.1
You can call it an art nowadays, there are a lot of ways to say im sorry and a lot of ways to neglect saying it as it can be defined an *art*. "Im sorry" two simple words which most people hate and avoid to say , is it that hard? Maybe because it hurts the pride? or is it so powerful and a shame to apologize to people, especially to your closest friends. An apology that comes straight from your heart can fix up relationships, dissolve your anger, soothe any shattered pride or heal a broken heart. On the contrast , avoiding it, makes everything strained, and it can reveal a lot of negative things about you.
The keys to a good successful apology can be pointed out , by regretting what you did ,admitting responsibility for it, and trying to fix it or make it up , it all starts mostly by saying the magical fearful word *sorry*
An example, lets say you had plans with a friend for a movie or so, and you couldnt make it and you tell your friend and he left furious, even though this is isnt a big conflict, u should apologize:
-say sorry
-show indication that you wont do this in your future behavior
- offer some compensation ( my treat next time)
i know most of you will think that everyone does that and im talking nonsense, but a lot of people these days just dont, they will find or make up any *excuse* to just run away , and when you confront them about it , *makes us look weak*, *embarrassing* and those other stupid reasons.
i know im bashing about people not making apologies here but here is what's ironic, some over-apologize even when it's not their mistake. Say sorry only when you truely mean it. Saying it after a fight just to avoid further argument wont do any good. No matter who you are, deep down in, you'll still feel that you were right and your partner was wrong. The issue does not get resolved and the next time even a smallest of mistake by your partner will snowball into a major issue and all the old matters that you will remember will be raised again, leaving both of you frustrated; or you'll keep stacking up apologizes till one day you'll burst and everything falls with you.
Never take your time to say you're sorry, once i was told *sorry* after an incident 2 years ago , i was all confused and i even didnt remember the person, in other words, it means nothing if you take your own sweet time, but that doesnt mean you go rushing in it , take your time , especially if you're dealing with a girl, it has to be almost-perfect.
Never bring up old issues, you are there to accept your mistake and admit for your crime and it's not the time to criticize , in fact it's the worst time to do that. After apologizing, wait for the reaction . Give them an opportunity to vent off their feelings, hurt as well as anger. Be patient with them, some will give you a hard time but at the end it's your mistake and you'll get your forgiveness sooner or later if you did everything right.
Here i am , wanting to write about people not apologizing and i drifted on being Dr.Phil Oman :p
Anyway, its stuff i learned outwards the years and im sorry if it offended any of you peepz out there ;)
i just wanted to apologize (A)
The keys to a good successful apology can be pointed out , by regretting what you did ,admitting responsibility for it, and trying to fix it or make it up , it all starts mostly by saying the magical fearful word *sorry*
An example, lets say you had plans with a friend for a movie or so, and you couldnt make it and you tell your friend and he left furious, even though this is isnt a big conflict, u should apologize:
-say sorry
-show indication that you wont do this in your future behavior
- offer some compensation ( my treat next time)
i know most of you will think that everyone does that and im talking nonsense, but a lot of people these days just dont, they will find or make up any *excuse* to just run away , and when you confront them about it , *makes us look weak*, *embarrassing* and those other stupid reasons.
i know im bashing about people not making apologies here but here is what's ironic, some over-apologize even when it's not their mistake. Say sorry only when you truely mean it. Saying it after a fight just to avoid further argument wont do any good. No matter who you are, deep down in, you'll still feel that you were right and your partner was wrong. The issue does not get resolved and the next time even a smallest of mistake by your partner will snowball into a major issue and all the old matters that you will remember will be raised again, leaving both of you frustrated; or you'll keep stacking up apologizes till one day you'll burst and everything falls with you.
Never take your time to say you're sorry, once i was told *sorry* after an incident 2 years ago , i was all confused and i even didnt remember the person, in other words, it means nothing if you take your own sweet time, but that doesnt mean you go rushing in it , take your time , especially if you're dealing with a girl, it has to be almost-perfect.
Never bring up old issues, you are there to accept your mistake and admit for your crime and it's not the time to criticize , in fact it's the worst time to do that. After apologizing, wait for the reaction . Give them an opportunity to vent off their feelings, hurt as well as anger. Be patient with them, some will give you a hard time but at the end it's your mistake and you'll get your forgiveness sooner or later if you did everything right.
Here i am , wanting to write about people not apologizing and i drifted on being Dr.Phil Oman :p
Anyway, its stuff i learned outwards the years and im sorry if it offended any of you peepz out there ;)
i just wanted to apologize (A)
OMG you sound like a shrink o.0
t5awaf..!!
I have to agree with the fact that apologizing nowadays has turned into an art.
i added some humour :p ! i guess i can be a shrink sometimes xD